hula hoops and hampster wheels

Sooo the other night I was over at Dave's for dinner.
I was supposed to cook chicken breasts -- but they were frozen. So instead of defrosting we changed our minds on a whim and decided to have meatballs.

You know quick easy- frozen meatballs -- zapped in the microwave, a variety of dipping sauces available from the fridge -- kraft mac n chese for our carbs on the side.

So I'm make the macaroni n cheese - gotta love the blue box. Dave's pulling out the possible dipping sauces -- and I'm putting the meatballs in the microwave. It's at this point I'm looking at his unique and varied condiments.

Honey, this barbeque sauce is expired.

Eh, it only a couple months - it won't kill us.

Fine, you can eat it.

Dave, this other barbeque sauce -- is expired... expired last year.

Manly man throws glass bottle into garbage for dramatic baskball player points.

Honey, let take a look at what else is expired:

Grape Jelly: expired: January 2007
Sour Cream: expired: April 2008
Honey Mustard: expired: February 2008
Yellow Mustard: expired: November 2007
Soy Sauce: expired: June 2007
Ketchup: safe
Ranch Dressing: safe
Blue Cheese Dressing: safe
A-1: June 2008
Sweet n Sour sauce: can not read expiration date-most likely expired
Miracle Marinade: expired: Febraury 2007

Ding. The meatballs are dinging, oh they still need a couple minutes.
I'm draining the noodles as Dave is throwing items into the trash -- so I'm not sure what these expired items were -- but he had several barbeque and steak sauces -- so
I can only imagine the expiration dates.

The meatball bag is still on the counter -- the meatballs are done, and macaroni is done.

Honey, the meatballs are expired.

Well, what do you expect we microwaved them?

No, seriously -- they expired January -- 2006.

Well -- they look fine.

Really?

So now I'm in a position -- he is not at all grossed out by this -- I can make him test a meatball -- but I know he'll just say they are fine, or I can be the brave one and eat a two year old meatball.

I eat it. We wait 15 minutes to make sure I don't get instant gout -
and I don't...

So we eat the meatballs that have been tucked away in the freezer.
Dipped in slightly expired sweet n sour sauce and perfectly made macaroni and cheese -- not expired in the least.


The aftermath consisted of very bad gas -- could have been the herbs and seasoning -- in the meatballs -- but I'm convinced it was our bodies telling us to throw the bag out. This is the first time - Dave has not wanted leftovers wrapped up for the next day.

The next day I was hoping I wouldn't need a butter knife like dear Ava did! And that's as graphic as I'm going to get in the poo poo report. For those of you who have no idea what that means -- think cement in the shape of mighty python.