Have you ever had that co-worker where you don't really know them - but you know that you don't like them.
There was said person working at XYZ let's call her Stomps. She is Stomps because she couldn't sit in her desk for more than 5 minutes, she lacked the ability to walk like a woman she Stomped around.
Well the Stomping has ceased. She is no longer there and it is Joy, evil evil Joy.
Also on a side note. I've mended the fence with Giggles. I don't have to like him - I can think he's annoying as all get out but he's not a horrible person - he's just socially unaware of his cubical surroundings and his ridiculous laugh. So bygones.
So tonight was a date night with Clinton. After our outing, I was driving home feeling like a goober - so I turned on the Lite Fm station. Delilah was ding her radio show. Some woman called in a requested a song that inspires. She gave her testimonial - now a prerequisite for having Delilah play a song for you.
It went something like this:
Caller:
My name is Melissa and I'm a mom of three kids and we want you to play a song for us. We are at a new stage in life and need something that inspires us! We are moving into a new house, my first house, I'm recently divorced, I just bought a new car and I'm also a foster mom. I love being a mom and my life is going really well right now, but I've been listening to your show and I left my husband since my marriage didn't sound as picturesque and happy and blissful as your sappy callers claimed it to be. But one day I hope to find the one. I deserve it. I'm a good person and great mom.
Delilah: Well it sounds like you need to inspire us with all the positive thing going on in your life.
Caller: Well I do get lonely listening to your show without that special someone to love.
Delilah: Well do you believe that there is something bigger than you and me out there - who loves you more than you love your children?
Caller: I'd like to think so. I believe God has a plan
Delilah: Well you know God loves you and do you believe he loves you more than you can possibly know?
Caller: I hope so. It's so hard to imagine.
Delilah: He does and he has a plan for you Melissa and for your children and you are on the road t greatness with the positive energy you have.
Caller: Thanks Delilah. I love God and will be patient for his plan.
Delilah: It's hard sometimes but while we wait for God's plan I have a song for you.
queue music:
Song Played: believe by Cher.
Moral of the Story - Divas are Deities?
So after my last post being all somber and moderatly melodramatic - I think I need another post to bring back the smiles.
but I'm kind of at a loss right now for what to write. I know, normally you just can't shut me up and now I'm being quiet wtf?
So I will rant on about how stupid facebook applications waste too much of my time. Yes, that's right Sorority Life - addicting and stupid and yet - I am addicted to playing the games for virtual outfits. What is wrong with me?
I've also found this fun website for photos on the interweb - check it out sometime - http://vi.sualize.us/.
Happy Easter Headbutt!
On to making lemonade with life.
So it's approaching. One year since my dad died. Grief is funny - it sneaks up on you once you think you're ok and reached some sort of acceptance, something pops into your head when you least expected. A year ago - I would have said I have a pretty healthy grieving process - I've lost grandparents and aunts and uncles and great aunts and great uncles and pets and friends and yet nothing really prepares you for losing a parent. I don't know if I'm doing it right - but I get up each day, put my pants on one leg at time and carry on - that's the plan anyway.
Everyone deals with the grasp on mortality a little different. The religious are convinced that the loved one is in heaven and safe and good. I don't really believe in the heaven/hell concept. But if there is one adage my Dad referred to was - although pessimistic and depressing, 'You start dying the day you are born' and the other classic one was 'After you die - you just die, you are put in the ground and become worm bait.' So someone asked me - knowing that my religious convictions are on that border line between non-existent and recovering if losing my dad has brought me back to Christianity. I think that quite the opposite has occurred. My dad was not a religious man - he believed what he wanted to believe and what that was I'll never know. But in the end -- we all die, Jesus will not save you from death or becoming worm bait. I guess the biggest thing that happened was the confirmation that it doesn't matter. You can believe in whatever you want - and pray as hard as you want but it doesn't change things that have or haven't happened - it can make you feel better and that can cause change - but you don't get to pray for an undo.
This may seem juvenile or selfish but I jealous when I think about things in life yet to come and how it'll be different without having my dad. Like today for instance - Clinton's dad was on the phone with his granddaughter talking about the Easter bunny coming and what she got in her basket. My dad would have been a good grandpa - a little cranky but good but I'll never really know. Or when I'm watching a chick flick movie and the bride and father have the father-daughter dance- not that I'm a big wedding person - but now I'll never have that option for the dorky dance. It's also weird to refer to everything as my mom's now - my mom's house, having Clinton meet my mom - instead of meet my parents. Or like today - I talked to my mom on the phone while at Clint's - and she said to say happy easter to everyone. So I said to Clint's mom - that my mom says Happy Easter. She then inquires oh well what are they doing? I don't know how to reply - So I just say that my mom and brother and sister are just hanging out making cake. It some how ends up sounding like my parents are divorced or I'm omitting my dad on purpose - but I just don't know what they know and I don't always feel like sharing for fear I'll start crying and being emotional girl. Then Clint who refers to his parent's as the folks - said 'I needed to get back to my folks' place for dinner' as we were leaving the brunch - so maybe he feels awkward too - or it was just a singular/plural slip up. Then there is the other obvious possibility and that is that I'm cranky and irritable and overly emotional due to having my period.
I'm thinking this will be a regular reoccuring post topic. Amazon does it - netflix does it - and now I will do it- I will give you suggestions based on your likes and dislikes. I will use amazon as my guide but filter out all the crap and try to offer selections that I have encountered and or read in conjunction with new to me titles.
We will start to day with if you like David Sedaris you will like the following:
Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress by Susan Jane Gilman (current bathroom read, super funny)
if you liked Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress you'd like:
I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies): True Tales of a Loudmouth Girl by Laurie Notaro
(also hillarious in the narrative/essay genre ) if you like I Love Everybody and other Atrocious Lies you'd like:
Why I'm Like This: True Stories (P.S.) by Cynthia Kaplan, as you can see todays theme is essay and funny/entertaining slightly autobiographical rantings. I love it when books read like blogs.
if you like Why I'm Like this you'd like:
Leave the Building Quickly: True Stories (P.S.) by Cynthia Kaplan this is the sequil to the aforementioned Cynthia Kaplan - I want this chick to come out with a new book.
and amazon says if you like Cynthia Kaplan you'd like:
I Was Told There'd Be Cake by Sloane Crosley ( it's on my to read stack but clint is currently holding the book hostage which is ok since I have a couple other books in the works at the moment.)
if you like I was told there'd be cake or Cynthia Kaplan you'd like
Running with Scissors: A Memoir by Augusten Burroughs , this was funny and gross and funny and disturbing...
if you like that you like this:
Possible Side Effects by Augusten Burroughs this one is also on the to read stack...
but I'm going to take a stab here and say if you like that you'll like this one:
My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands (Paperback)by Chelsea Handler
or the man version:
I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by Tucker Max
and then onward:
I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence by Amy Sedaris
this looks good too:
Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter (Hardcover)by Steve Dublanica Aka The Waiter
and that is this weeks installment of If you like this then you might like this
Ok so I'm not a uber feminazi however the tits and ass window clings have got to go. Seriously, are you that much more manly in your big truck that is obviously overcompensating for your small Mr. Winky that you think you'll get all the girls if you have Barbie's silhouette posing with pointy boobies and windblown hair? And what about the Married women - can't you satisfy your husband enough so he doesn't need to display such juvinille red neck window clings?
Sheesh where am I? I guess it's a smidge better than the Get R Done window cling but not by much.
