hula hoops and hampster wheels

So I popped onto OKCupid.com awhile back to see what's out there - I'm passively looking through profiles - seeing the other fish in the sea.

Let me tell you, I am not impressed. Why can't normal guys be out there?

The crappy thing about the free okc is that they have this chat thing- and when ever I am passively browsing or taking ridiculous quizzes - someone always wants to have a conversation. A conversation that I do not want to have.

Loser: hi
Me: hi
Loser: how r u?
Me: fine, can you not use those abbreviations they are really annoying to me.
Loser: haha ok
Loser: so you seem like a really open person from your profile.
Me: I guess
Loser: So can I ask some questions?
Me: shoot
Loser: How do you give a blow job - tell me in detail.
Me: I will not share my top secret technique with anyone- it's not up for discussion.
Loser: How big are your breasts and pussy?
Me: I don't measure them. Please stop with this inappropriate sex talk. Are you unable to have a normal conversation?
Loser: Don't you want to f*** me?
Me: Nope
Loser: Why not?
Me: 1. I don't know you. 2. You're acting like a dillweed. 3.I don't have random sex with dillweeds.
me: goodbye
blocking loser.


SO I then continue to browse through a couple profiles -- get accosted by some non english speaking fellow who due to conversation barrier I also block.


Then I see a suggested user. This is someone I know - and I start laughing hysterically.

OKC thinks I would be a great match with drum roll please......my cousin Jake.

So I send him a message - Jake, Sorry Cousin but I'm not into relatives that way. OKC has got it all wrong, we are not from West Virginia!


He replies back and is laughing for multiple reasons - he has confessed that he's been out at the bars and is a little wasted and the ridiculousness of okc's suggestion and his random okc mail from his cousin. The I had to explain what happened with Dave and all of that.

So yeah.

Isn't getting back out there exciting.